is love still in de air ...?

i'm sick, again. down with terrible flu & my body heat really make me uncomfortable. I need to rest more, and yeah, I promise people (to those who keep urging me to rest more), I'l lessen my outdoor activities. thanks for de concern ya all ..

de conflict between me & Double-H doesnt show any sign of improvement. he keeps on with his sarcasm & doesnt take serious on this matter. I dont knw what he is up to.
honestly, I do still have de loves towards him. its not easy to forget that someone special just like that. he is de man in my life, de man I love more thn my other boy friends. but, if we cant find any way out from this conflict, I'm not sure about the future of this relationship.
I miss him, a lot. I miss de moments we spent together. although I put up a happy front, deep inside my heart, no 1 knows. I make myself happy everyday in order not to dwell much on this matter but it doesnt make me forget completely.
I want 2 be happy, I'd enough of keep thinking bout other people but not myself.

a cousin of mine suggested me to end de relationship. no, she ddidnt mean any harm, but she dont want me to be depressed. when I refused, she asked me if I couldnt live w/o a man?
my reply was :
I can survive even w/o any man in my life. in my family, there is no man to guide me but I still stand strong. there is no leader to lead the family but, it doesnt stop me from being where I am at now. my life is surrounded by many strong women whom I admire real much.

I never give any hope bcoz I'm worried that I may dissapoint people, and I had stopped hoping too in order not to get dissapointed.

I'm happy with de people close to me; family & friends.

"When one door of happiness closes, another opens, but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us."